Archive for the ‘About’ Category

In Part 1 of this series I discussed why it’s a good idea to sleep train your baby and the bedtime routine, your first step. Now I will discuss the various methods to help your child learn how to fall asleep without your “help”.

Co-Sleeping

Co-sleeping is not a “sleep training method”, but I wanted to talk about a way you can sleep train your baby but still co-sleep. Remember, sleep training is not cry-it-out (CIO). You can sleep train without letting your baby cry. Co-sleeping works for many families without any special steps taken, but for some it’s difficult due to the fact their baby wants to nurse all night. Nursing may or may not be the challenge for the mother, but perhaps the fact she can’t go right back to sleep during or after nursing. And, maybe mom and dad want to continue co-sleeping, but not nurse all night.

In some cases, nursing while co-sleeping has become the baby’s sleep association and the key is to break that association. But, how do you do it without letting the baby cry, yet still sleep in the family bed? The key to this dilemma is to help your baby learn to fall asleep without nursing. You will want to move nursing away from the final moment your baby falls asleep, but without replacing one sleep association (e.g. nursing to sleep) for another (e.g. rocking your baby). I include pacifiers as a sleep association. I am not a big fan of pacifiers but know plenty of people who use them and have no problems. But, others become frustrated they are replacing the pacifier 8-10 times per night. At this point, the pacifier has become a hindrance more than a help, so be very careful not to replace nursing with a pacifier. Once baby learns how to fall asleep without nursing, (s)he can start to learn to go BACK to sleep throughout the night, which is true of all sleep associations. This method will take a lot of patience, determination and committment on the parents’ parts, but with consistency, it can work.

Co-sleeping Safety

I would be remiss if I didn’t talk about co-sleeping safety. It gets a bad rep sometimes, but when done properly, it can be perfectly safe. If you feel nervous you are going to roll on top of the baby, an Arm’s Reach Co-Sleeper or The First Years Close & Secure Sleeper are great options. Dr. Sears’ website has more tips including put baby next to mom, not between mom and dad, sleep in a large queen or king-size bed, and don’t sleep on a too-cushion-y surface where you might roll over too easily (e.g. waterbed or couch), among other tips. He makes sure to mention not to sleep with your baby if you are severely sleep-deprived where you might be less aware of your baby. Ironically, I would think this is when most people do start to sleep with their baby (if they didn’t plan to from the get-go like me).

When co-sleeping isn’t working

There may be another reason or multiple reasons co-sleeping is difficult for your family. If it’s not working for you, that’s okay. It works for some, but not all. This is not a reflection on you as a parent. Some people are too nervous and don’t sleep well due to worry. I’d say that makes you a caring parent. Some people just can’t go right back to sleep. You have no control over that. Some babies are very active, waking you up all hours of the night. Whatever the reason, if it’s not working for you, don’t let guilt drive you to more and more sleep deprivation, which can lead to unhappiness, stress, and depression. Once you feel ready, you may want to transition your baby out of the family bed. As I always say, well-rested babies make happy babies and well-rested parents make happy parents and happy parents make better parents.

Continue to Part 3 of this series where I discuss the “fading” approach.

One of the sites I’ve been perusing, as I develop this blog, is IttyBiz, which is an advice blog for small business owners. This week there was an interesting challenge in which she asks us to answer a few questions about what we do. She asks us these questions:

• What’s your game? What do you do?
• Why do you do it? Do you love it, or do you just have one of those creepy knacks?
• Who are your customers? What kind of people would need or want what you offer?
• What’s your marketing USP? Why should I buy from you instead of the other losers?
• What’s next for you? What’s the big plan?

I thought that I could do a special post today answering these questions.

What’s your game? What do you do?

Why thank you for asking. I give advice to parents who have challenging sleepers about how they can help establish healthy sleep habits whereby getting more sleep for both their babies and THEM!

Why do you do it? Do you love it, or do you just have one of those creepy knacks?

A little of both, actually. I had a very challenging sleeper as a first-born and once I was able to function again and after months of getting him to sleep well, I made it my mission to help other tired mommies and daddies. I think the “knack” I have is the ability to retain a lot of what I read, take someone else’s situation and philosophies, use my analytical skills, and figure out some advice that can help them. My “knack” is also that I can give advice and support without coming off as a know-it-all, pass judgment or make anyone feel bad for what they’ve done up until this point. Many parents blame themselves and are really hard on themselves. We’ve all been there and when you have a new baby, you do whatever you have to, to survive.

Who are your customers? What kind of people would need or want what you offer?

Very very very tired mommies and daddies. Over 12,000 babies are born every day in the U.S. alone. Many of those babies seem to struggle with learning how to sleep and the parents of those babies are who I would try to help.

What’s your marketing USP? Why should I buy from you instead of the other losers?

Well, I see many other “sleep consultants” who are very gimmick-y. They claim to help your child sleep in just 3 days or they sell you an eBook, which is basically a one-size-fits-all “program”. First of all, very very very tired mommies and daddies (see previous question) do not have the time, energy, or concentration to read all the books out there on helping a baby sleep. And, everyone’s situation is UNIQUE, so I don’t believe just one book or method will work for every baby. It’s very frustrating to read all these stories about babies who cry for 5 minutes and then sleep all night for the rest of their lives, when that is NOT YOUR reality! That’s where I come in. I’ve read numerous books and have it fresh in my mind (call me your cliffs notes) because of all the advice I give on a daily basis. I take the parent’s situation and figure out the best course of action based on their philosophy as the parent and the baby’s personality and temperament. So, in other words, a parent should buy from me because I offer a one-on-one personal touch, give great advice, and stick with them as they go through it giving them support all along the way.

What’s next for you? What’s the big plan?

What’s next is to see if I can get paid for this service. Right now I’m doing all of this for free. So, I’m working on this website to get some good content for parents to read such that I can become a good great online resource that can be passed among many parents. I am in the process of setting up some online services that can be purchased along with a free service, which I will announce very shortly.

I hope that gives you, the readers, a glimpse about all I do. And, I hope that it makes you want to know more.

Learn more about me here and here.